Enamoured has put together some helpful hints to assist you in achieving your dream wedding. If you're unsure of how to start planning for the most memorable day of your lives this is a good place start. From planning your engagement party, responsibilities of the bridal party, choosing your gown or speeches we have it covered.
- Planning an Engagement Party
- Legal Issues
- Responsibilities of the Bridal Party
- Who Pays Checklist
- Wedding To Do Checklist
- Traditions
- Girls Night In - Wedding Videos
- Bridal Shower Games
- Choosing Your Gown
- Wedding Fashion Styles
- Gift Suggestions
- Ceremony
- Top 100 Wedding Songs
- Reception Etiquette
- Bridal Party Seating
- Speeches
- Wedding Anniversaries
PLANNING AN ENGAGEMENT PARTY
by Jenny Storchenegger
If you choose to have an engagement party it can be as lavish or casual, as you like.
Think of your engagement party as a practice run for organising your wedding. Here are some hints and tips to help you plan your special event and make it a day you and your partner will cherish forever…
If you haven’t already done so, announce your wedding to the world with an advertisement in your local or metropolitan newspaper. Traditionally the bride’s parents pay for the engagement notice although couples may choose to pay for this themselves.
VENUE
Discuss the style of party you would like and venue options with your partner. Also decide on a guest list so that you know how many people to cater for.
A cocktail party, BBQ and Fancy Dress are very different styles and may require different venues. You may choose a hall nearby, a hotel, function centre, a park for a picnic or your backyard.
When contacting a possible venue, be sure to ask:
• The maximum capacity, number of heads.
• Alcohol permitted. BYO or licensed?
• Back up plan for bad weather? If the function is in the garden can a marquee be hired?
• If catering is included, ask about vegetarian and diabetic diets.
• Whether the facility is suited to children.
If you are having it at home, there are many catering services and party shops available to help cater for and decorate the venue.
FOOD
Think of the season and select food appropriately. Hot soup is lovely in winter however, salads and cold meats may be more appropriate in summer. Try not to choose food that is too exotic, as it may not suit the tastes of all of your guests.
INVITATIONS
These can be printed for you, you can buy pre-packaged sets or make your own.
Usually, those who are invited to your engagement party will also be invited to your wedding.
When sending the invitations, include gift registry information if you have decided to register for gifts. This is only really appropriate if you have a large guest list. Include an RSVP with the invitation for the convenience of your guests.
Mention how you would like people to dress, for example, if the event is a backyard BBQ in a paddock remind guests to dress casually. You don’t want Aunt Dot’s best going out shoes to step in a cow patty.
Be clear as to whether children are invited and be flexible where necessary.
Provide a map with the invitation if the venue is hard to find. Send your invitations at least four weeks before the event.
PHOTOGRAPHY AND VIDEO
You may choose to enlist the help of a talented friend or ask your wedding photographer if you can work out a package to include your engagement photos.
FORMALITIES
Depending on the venue, you may have to consider hiring an MC (friends or family members tend to be good at this too), music (live or a disc jockey) and perhaps organise speeches.
If the party has been hosted in your honour be sure to thank the hosts publicly for their efforts and kindness.
THEMES AND DECORATIONS
A theme can be as simple as a particular colour trend where invites, table cloths, balloons etc. match. A more elaborate plan could be to host a dress up party such as a Hawaiian Luau. There are many function decorators or hire places that can help you out with props, balloons, decorations and even tables and chairs.
PERSONAL TOUCHES
You may choose to design a photomontage. You can include pictures of you and your partner and certain friends and relatives that show significant or humorous aspects of your relationship. This can be a real talking point.
You may choose to leave a signature plate out or pass a book to guests and ask them to write a message to you and your partner.
If you are having a large event, you may wish to leave a small gift or bomboniere for each guest or couple at the table.
You could supply guests with disposable cameras so that they can capture special moments that the photographer may miss.
DO:
• Consider your budget and work within what you can afford to spend.
• Be sensitive with the date you choose. If you choose a date around Christmas, accept that some people may not be able to attend.
• Make sure your guests are comfortable. Have plenty of seating and tables to suit the style of the event, and ensure the cutlery is right for the type of food you are serving.
• Be responsible. Ensure that you have a variety of non-alcoholic drinks available for those who will be driving home.
• Make time for all of your guests as best you can. If you are shy, walking up to a group of people with a plate of appetisers is a great icebreaker.
• Find some helpers if you are catering the event yourself so that you don’t spend the whole night in the kitchen.
• Give out of town guests information about hotels or places to stay in the area.
• Take the time to thank your guests for any presents you may receive. Follow up with a phone call or send a Thank You card.
DON’T:
• Ask guests to pay for themselves at a restaurant unless your guests are very close to you and you know they won’t mind paying.
• Combine an engagement party with a house warming or birthday party. Make it a special event in it’s own right.
• Spend your night making sure everyone is happy and forget about yourself.
LEGAL ISSUES
The Marriage Act 1961 lists the legal requirements for marriage. Essentially these are:
• The bride and groom must give notice of their intended marriage to their celebrant/minister not less than one month and one day and not more than 18 months before the date of the marriage. The notice must be given on the form ‘Notice of Intended Marriage’.
• The bride and groom must be 18 years of age otherwise parents’ consent is required.
• The bride and groom must produce evidence of their age to their celebrant/ minister. This must be by official birth certificates or in special cases, passports or Certificates of Naturalisation with a statutory declaration stating the full reason why the birth certificate could not be produced.
• If either party has been previously married, evidence of termination of the marriage must be produced to their celebrant/minister. This is by certificate of decree absolute or full death certificate.
• A fee must be paid, which varies from State to State.
• The ceremony must be witnessed by two people who are over 18 years of age.
At the end of your ceremony you will be required to sign the Marriage Register, Certificate of Marriage and Wedding Certificate in front of two witnesses and your celebrant/minister.
Upon marriage any previous will becomes ineffective. So after your wedding remember to make an appointment with your solicitor to make another will.
CHANGING YOUR NAME
A bride is not required to take her husband’s surname. If you do choose to change your name, sign your maiden name on your marriage certificate; from then on sign your new, married name. You will need to advise your change of name for the following:
• driver’s licence
• car registration
• bank accounts
• Medicare
• health care fund
• mortgage
• taxation department
• Centrelink
• Passport
• electoral office
• superannuation fund
• credit cards
RESPONSIBILITIES OF THE BRIDAL PARTY
THE BRIDE
• Organise announcement of engagement
• Organise engagement party
• Introduce bride’s and groom’s parents
• Choose date of wedding with groom
• Decide type of wedding with groom
• Choose wedding rings with groom
• Organise ‘Notification of Intention to Marry’
• Book ceremony venue and meet with priest or celebrant with groom
• Book reception venue, plan menu and drinks
• Choose chief bridesmaid, bridesmaids and flowergirls
• Make out a guest list with your family
• Choose a photographer and videographer
• Choose and order invitations, other wedding stationery and accessories
• Choose your wedding dress, shoes and accessories
• Consult with bridesmaids about their dresses
• Choose and order flowers
• Organise music for ceremony and reception
• Visit gift registry with groom and select gifts
• Buy gifts for groom, attendants and ushers
• List gifts as received and send off thank you cards
• Choose wedding cars with groom
• Choose honeymoon destination
• Check passports, visa etc if having overseas honeymoon
• Prepare a speech (optional)
• Organise any change of name documentation if required
• Update your will
THE GROOM
• Choose wedding rings with bride
• Make out a guest list with your family
• Choose best man, groomsmen and pageboys
• Choose wedding cars with bride and organise transport from reception to hotel
• Check passports, visas etc if having overseas honeymoon
• Organise church fees and give to best man to pay after ceremony
• Prepare a speech
• Update your will
CHIEF BRIDESMAID
• Organise all pre-wedding parties/showers
• Help bride dress on wedding day
• Help bridesmaids and flowergirls on wedding day
• Hold groom’s ring and bride’s bouquet during the ceremony
• Sign register as official witness
• Prepare a speech (optional)
• Take bride’s wedding dress home after wedding
• Organise the taking home of all gifts from reception
BEST MAN
• Organise bachelor party
• Organise delivery and return of suits
• Help groom dress on wedding day
• Drive groom to ceremony venue
• Hold bride’s ring during the ceremony
• Hold envelope with church/celebrant’s fee for paying to minister/celebrant
• Sign register as official witness
• Act as MC at reception if required
• Prepare a speech
• Organise bride and groom’s luggage to honeymoon night hotel
BRIDESMAIDS/GROOMSMEN
• Assist bride and groom as much as possible
• Assist with collecting gifts from reception and taking to bride and groom’s home
BRIDE’S MOTHER
• Assist bride as much as possible
• Organise to meet groom’s parents
• Make out a guest list
• Mail invitations at least six weeks before wedding day
• Organise accommodation for out of town guests
BRIDE’S FATHER
• Accompany bride to ceremony venue
• Escort bride down the aisle and ‘give her away’
Prepare a speech
WHO PAYS: CHECKLIST
Traditionally there are guidelines about who is responsible for paying for the wedding, though these days both sets of parents often contribute to the cost of wedding. For second marriages, the couple usually pay for everything themselves. Discuss your requirements with your families and work out what’s best for you.
BRIDE’S PARENTS
• Engagement notice and party
• Wedding announcements
• Reception venue
• Reception music
• Caterer
• Equipment hire
• Decorating
• Stationery
• Flowers for church and reception
• Cake
• Make-up and Hair
• Cars for bride and bridesmaids
• Bomboniere and accessories
BRIDE’S PARENTS OR BRIDE
• Bride’s gown
• Bride’s accessories
• Bride’s shoes
BRIDE’S PARENTS OR BRIDE AND GROOM
• Photographer
• Video
BRIDE’S OR GROOM’S PARENTS
• Liquor
GROOM OR GROOM’S PARENTS
• Bouquets
• Buttonholes & corsages
BRIDE
• Groom’s ring
GROOM
• Engagement ring
• Ceremony venue
• Celebrant/minister
• Ceremony music
• Bride’s ring
• Groom’s attire
• Car for groom
• Going away car
BRIDE AND GROOM
• Attendant’s gifts
• Honeymoon
ATTENDANTS
• Attendant’s attire
SIX TO 12 MONTHS BEFORE
• Decide the date and time of your wedding
• Arrange a meeting between your two families to decide on the size, style and cost of your wedding and draw up a draft guest list
• Book your ceremony venue and make an appointment with a celebrant,priest or minister to discuss the ceremony
• Book the reception venue and caterers and look at sample menus
• Shop around for a photographer, videographer, florist, musicians, cake and cars
• Shop around for a gown and bridesmaids gowns
• Book your honeymoon
FOUR MONTHS BEFORE
• Finalise your guest list
• Choose and order your wedding rings
• Confirm arrangements for your ceremony including the music, readings and order of service
• Choose and order your invitations and other stationery
• Finalise honeymoon plans and make sure your passports are up to date
• Confirm reception venue and advise selected menu
• Book musicians and entertainment
THREE MONTHS BEFORE
• Begin a gift register with your chosen department store
• Send out the invitations and gift list
• Book groom’s and groomsmen’s suits
• Make appointments with your hairdresser and beautician
• Shop for lingerie
• Order flowers, cakes, bomboniere and accessories
• Book cars or other transport
TWO MONTHS BEFORE
• Choose gifts for the attendants
• Pick up your rings and check engravings
• Plan a bridesmaids’ party
• Send announcements to newspapers
• Mark off acceptances as they begin coming in
• Confirm final shot list with your photographer
• Confirm the programme with your musicians
• Publish your ‘Notice of Intention to Marry’
ONE MONTH TO GO
• Confirm honeymoon reservations and pick up airline tickets
• Work out your reception seating plan and advise reception venue
• Time the journey from home to the ceremony venue
• Notify your bank of change of name details
• Arrange your hen’s night
ONE WEEK TO GO
• Have the wedding rehearsal
• Pack for your honeymoon
• Throw a party for the bridesmaids
• Prepare your speech
• Check all final details for your reception
• Have a trial make-up and hair session
• Arrange for someone to ensure your wedding clothes get sent home, hired items are returned, wedding cake is sent to those who could not come and gifts are taken home safely
• Take some time out for yourself - have a massage or facial, go to a health spa or away overnight with a friend
These wedding traditions have developed as a sign of the sealing of the marriage bargain. They symbolise the many virtues of a successful marriage including fertility, happiness and prosperity.
SOMETHING OLD, SOMETHING NEW, SOMETHING BORROWED ; SOMETHING BLUE
Something old - protects the bride and links the wedding day with her past.
Something new - brings success and good luck to the bride’s future life.
Something borrowed - transfers happiness to the bride when borrowed from a happily married woman.
Something blue - signifies loyalty and faithfulness.
THE WEDDING CAKE
The wedding cake has been a part of wedding celebrations since the time of the ancient Romans who broke a thin loaf over the bride’s head at the end of the ceremony as a symbol of abundance. The crumbs were eaten by the wedding guests as they were believed to be good luck.
The ancient Greeks offered cakes made of fruit, nuts and honey to the Gods seeking approval of the marriage and their blessings to the couple.
In England during the Middle Ages the bride and groom would kiss over a pile of small wedding cakes to ensure an abundance of healthy offspring.
It was a French baker who first iced a wedding cake with hard sugar frosting.
These days the custom of sharing the cake still represents the sharing of the happiness and good fortune felt by the newly-wed couple. The cake is usually shared out to guests by the bridesmaids and if the cake is a rich, dark fruit cake then the top layer is kept and frozen, to be eaten on the couple’s first anniversary or on the birth of the first baby.
RINGS
In very early times the engagement ring was given as partial payment for the bride and was a symbol of the groom’s good intentions. The first engagement rings were made of grass and later from leather, stone and crude metals. Diamonds became a feature in engagement rings in medieval Italy as they were the strongest gem thereby representing enduring love.
The wedding ring, exchanged during the wedding ceremony, is also a symbol of eternal love. In the past, it was considered lucky if silver rings were exchanged, later rings were often decorative with designs such as clasped hands, twin hearts or a single heart. Gold rings became fashionable during the 19th century and were often engraved with a short message, the couple’s initials and the date of the wedding.
The rings are placed on the 4th finger of the left hand as the early Egyptians believed this finger contained the vein that led to the heart.
The English Prayer Book of 1549 stated that the 4th finger of the left hand was the proper and holy place for all wedding rings.
THE HONEYMOON
In early Northern Europe, newly married couples drank a fermented honey drink, known as metheglen for thirty days or until the moon waned. This time became known as the honeymoon.
In ancient times when the bride was captured, the groom hid his bride to prevent her angry relatives from finding her. From this came the concept of the honeymoon trip.
THE TROUSSEAU/THE GLORY BOX
The trousseau is the bride’s outfit of clothes, linen and other goods which she brings with her at her marriage and is derived from the French word trousse, meaning “bundle”. Originally, it was part of the dowry paid by the bride’s parents to the groom as compensation for his expenses for caring for his wife.
Today the idea of the “the glory box” is generally out of favour as most brides are financially independent at the time of their marriage.
WEARING A BRIDAL VEIL
The bridal veil originated in Greek and Roman times and was considered a sign of youth and virginity. The veil was introduced into Europe with the return of the crusaders. With the arranging of a marriage, a bride was swathed in a veil and revealed to her husband after the ceremony. Anglo-Saxon brides wore their hair hanging loose while Jewish brides shaved their heads.
In more recent times the fashion of wearing a veil was introduced in the USA by Nellie Curtis at her wedding to an aide of President Washington following some flattering comments by her fiance after he had glimpsed her through a lace curtain at an open window.
CARRYING FLOWERS
Brides in ancient Rome carried herbs such as rosemary as a symbol of fidelity and fertility. In Greece the brides carried ivy, representing eternal love. Orange blossoms were favoured by the Saracens as orange trees bloom and bear fruit at the same time, thereby exhibiting youth, purity and fertility all at once. The Saracen’s custom of wearing a crown of orange blossoms on the bridal veil was introduced into Europe by the returning crusaders. Roses are considered the “love blossoms” and became very popular during the Victorian era.
TYING SHOES TO THE HONEYMOON CAR
Among the early Hebrews a sandal was often given as a sign of good faith following a property exchange. Later in Europe the shoe became a symbol of domestic authority and in Anglo-Saxon marriages the bride’s father transferred his authority to his new son-in-law by handing him his daughter’s shoe. The groom would then hold up the shoe and tap it on the bride’s head three times. Sometimes old shoes were thrown at the newly weds as they left the church and in Tudor times, people would throw old shoes over the Royal bridal carriage for good luck.
THROWING OF CONFETTI
While the idea of throwing a shoe hasn’t stuck, throwing confetti at the newly weds as they leave the church has.
The throwing of rice originated in the Orient as a symbol of good luck, fertility and prosperity and evolved into the coloured, paper confetti we know today. Many churches and ceremony venues have now banned the thowing of confetti in their grounds so rice is back in fashion (dyed in bright colours) as are rose petals, lavender and bubbles.
GIRLS NIGHT IN - WEDDING VIDEOS
A fun idea for a pre-wedding girls-night-in is a night watching videos with a wedding theme. It is also a great chance to get some ideas for wedding dresses and music for your ceremony or for that first dance as husband and wife. So grab some girl friends, a bowl of popcorn and get into the spirit of your wedding.
WEDDING CRASHERS
Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson are marriage mediators whose social lives evolve around the wedding season having been taught the “secrets” of wedding crashing in order to meet girls. And meet girls they do – their dance floor techniques, their balloon tricks to entertain child guests, their keenness to dance with flower girls and grandmas – make these two guys the most popular (and shaggable) guys at the wedding.
The last wedding of the season is the daughter of an influential politician and promises to be the best of all. But the guys find more than they bargained for and both reassess the importance of friendship and love in their lives.
There are a couple of good examples of what not to say in a best man or
chief bridesmaid speech.
MY BEST FRIEND’S WEDDING
Julianne and her best friend Michael made a pact at college - if they hadn’t married by the time they were 28 years old then they would marry each other. Julianne decides she wants to marry Michael - on the day he announces he is getting married to someone else. So now she has four days to break up the wedding.
THE WEDDING PLANNER
Mary Fiore is San Francisco’s most successful wedding planner. She’s professional, organised and unlucky in love. She just can’t find a Mr Right for herself. Until, that is, she falls literally for Steve Edison. But Steve is the finance of Mary’s biggest client ever, a rich heiress. Now Mary has to decide - true love or her job.
MY BIG FAT GREEK WEDDING
Toula is Greek, 30 and works in her parents’ restaurant as a ‘seating hostess’. Worst of all, according to her father, she is unmarried. Try as he might, he cannot find a good Greek man for her. But Toula finds her own man, gorgeous Ian. Problem is Ian is not Greek and the couple find their cultures clashing when their parents meet in hilarious circumstances. But love prevails and their wedding is a typical Greek wedding - big, loud and full of fun and family.
FOUR WEDDINGS & A FUNERAL
Hapless Charles, always a wedding guest and never a groom! Until he meets the beautiful Carrie (at a wedding of course) and falls madly in love. But Carrie marries someone else. Will Charles ever find true love?
RUNAWAY BRIDE
Ike Graham, a city newspaper columnist, writes an unflattering story about a small-town woman who has a reputation for leaving men stranded at the alter. After being fired from his paper, Ike sets out to prove he was right, but will he become stranded groom number four instead?
JUST MARRIED
Sarah and Tom are madly in love and have a wonderful relationship – until they get married that is. A disastrous honeymoon in which they don’t get to consummate their
marriage shows up their different backgrounds. Their problems are not helped by Sarah’s snobbish family and her ex-boyfriend who turns up to stay at the couple’s honeymoon hotel. Returning home tired and angry they separate and reflect on where they went wrong. Can true love triumph over adversity?
BRIDAL SHOWER GAMES
Here are some games to play at your bridal shower. Some are outrageous, some are creative and they are all guaranteed to have everyone laughing and having fun in no time!!
PASS THE CARROT
Choose a long carrot and get your guests to pass it to the person next to them - between their knees. Cut 1 or2cm off the carrot each time it is dropped. When the carrot is so small that it can’t be passed on, the holder is the winner.
POP THE BALLOON
The idea of this game is that your guests blow up a balloon, tie it and then break it. Before giving out the balloons put a piece of paper in each - on one piece put
the couple’s name and this person will receive a prize. It’s hilarious watching your guests work out how to break the balloon.
WHO AM I?
Write the names of some famous people on some labels and place a label on the back of each guest. Each player is then allowed to ask 3 questions per round to determine the identity of their famous person. Questions can only have a yes/no response eg. Am I female? Or am I an actor? The first player to guess their identity is the winner.
WHAT’S IN A HANDBAG?
Make up a list of everyday, and not so everyday, items that can be found in a handbag. Call out the item and the first person to pull that item out of their bag wins a prize. You’d be surprised at what some girls have in their bags.
CREATE A WEDDING GOWN
Split your guests into teams of 4 or 5 players. Give each group at least 3 rolls of toilet paper and ask them to choose a model from the group. The players have to create a wedding gown out of the toilet paper in 5 minutes. Give out prizes to the creators of the most stylish gown, the most practical gown, the prettiest gown etc.
PICTURE THE FUTURE
Spilt your guests into teams of at least 3 players. Give them a bundle of magazines, scissors, glue, a large piece of paper and a topic which relates to the bridal couple in the future such as the wedding day, the honeymoon, children or their home. Each group then makes a collage using pictures from the magazines to make a story about their topic.
WHAT’S IN A SOCK?
Get 10 clean socks and put in each sock an item the bridal couple will probably use on their honeymoon. Items such as sunscreen, condoms, sunglasses, keys, a watch. Tie up each sock and put a number on it. Pass the socks around to each player and they have to try and work out what is inside by using their feet. The person with the most correct items is the winner.
THE PRICE IS RIGHT
Make a list of 20 grocery items, listing the brand names and weights. Each player has to fill in the price next to each item and total their list. The player whose total is closest to the correct total is the winner.
SMART TRUTHS
Pass around a large bag of smarties (or other lollies) and get each guest to take as many as they want. When everyone has a handful, they each have to say one thing about the bride for each smarty they have in their hand. Make sure no-one cheats by trying to eat them first!!!
NO DONKEYS HERE
Draw a large picture of a naked man on a piece of cardboard and put it up on a wall. Draw the penis on a separate piece of cardboard and cut it out. Blindfold the bride, turn her three times and get her to “pin the penis on the groom”.
CARVE THE CUCUMBER
Spilt your guests into teams of 3-4 players and give each team a knife and a cucumber. Each team then carves the cucumber into the shape of a penis. First prize goes to the team whose cucumber is the best likeness, second prize goes to the team whose cucumber doesn’t look like a penis in any shape or form.
DONUT HEAVEN
Hang some large donuts off a clothesline with some string. The players stand in front of the donuts with their hands behind their back and the first person to eat their donut is the winner.
IN THE DARK
Blind fold each player and give them a cucumber and a wrapped condom. The first player who puts the condom on properly, without tearing it, is the winner.
Choosing Your Gown : Gowns for your figure
Ballerina
Princess
Fitted bodice with tulle skirt,
suits all shapes except petites –
the classic meringue.Fitted top with a flared skirt, is
flattering for most shapes and
creates a sense of length.
Two Piece 
Empire
Separate bodice and skirt, ideal
for those not in perfect
proportion.High cut bodice with a narrow,
flaring skirt. Great for petites.
Column 
Bias Cut
Straight silhouette ideal for
those who are tall and slim.Very figure hugging gown best
suited for tall and slim figures.
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GIFT SUGGESTIONS
BRIDESMAIDS:
jewellery (something they can wear on your wedding day) / silver photo frame (for group wedding photo) / glass vase / sunglasses case / engraved gold pen / evening bag /voucher for beauty treatment or aromatherapy massage / perfume
GROOMSMEN:
bottle of wine / key ring / leather wallet / cuff links / engraved gold pen / Swiss army knife /watch / go-karting day out / tie clip / money clip / sunglasses case
CHILD ATTENDANTS:
movie voucher / book / board game
CEREMONY
Prelude, [titles of musical pieces played]
Opening Prayer or Greeting
First Reading, [name of reading]
Rite of Marriage
Exchange of Vows
Blessing and Exchange of Rings
Lighting of the Unity Candle
Second Reading, [name of reading]
Nuptial Blessing
Closing Prayer
Recessional, [titles of musical pieces played]
CEREMONY MUSIC SUGGESTIONS
Music needs to be chosen to accompany all four parts of the wedding ceremony:
• Prelude - while guests are being seated.
• Processional - as the wedding party enters the church and walks down the aisle.
• Interlude - as the bride and groom sign the register and photographs are taken.
• Recessional - as the bride and groom walk down the aisle and out of the church.
TRADITIONAL SUGGESTIONS:
PRELUDE
Water Music by Handel
Sonata for Trumpet and Piano by Purcell
The Four Seasons by Vivaldi
PROCESSIONAL
Lohegrin Bridal Chorus by Wagner (Here Comes the Bride)
Canon in D Major by Pachelbel
Arrival of the Queen of Sheba by Handel
Water Music by Handel
INTERLUDE
Ave Maria by Schubert
Eline Kleine Nachtmusik by Beethoven
RECESSIONAL
Toccata from Symphony No. 5 by Widor
Wedding March from Midsummer Night's Dream by Mendelssohn
Grand March of Aida by Verdi
The Four Seasons by Vivaldi
TOP 100 WEDDING SONGS
If you’ would prefer a modern theme for your wedding we have listed the Top 100 Love Songs to help you find that special song:
1 Let's Get It On - 1973 Marvin Gaye
2 The Rose - 1980 Bette Midler
3 Love Me Tender - 1956 Elvis Presley
4 Thank You - 1999 Dido
5 More Than Words - 1990 Extreme
6 Building A Mystery - 1997 Sarah McLachlan
7 It's Only Love - 1977 The Beatles
8 Let's Stay Together - 1972 Al Green
9 You're The First, The Last, My Everything - 1975 Barry White
10 I'll Be There - 1970 The Jackson 5
11 Nothing Compares 2 U - 1990 Sinead O'Connor
12 I Got You Babe - 1965 Sonny & Cher
13 Wicked Game - 1989 Chris Isaak
14 Wonderful Tonight - 1978 Eric Clapton
15 Faithfully - 1983 Journey
16 And I Love Her - 1964 The Beatles
17 I Want You To Want Me - 1979 Cheap Trick
18 Careless Whisper - 1984 George Michael/Wham!
19 Superstar - 1971 The Carpenters
20 I Will Always Love You - 1992 Whitney Houston
21 Endless Love - 1981 Diana Ross & Lionel Richie
22 I Would Die 4 U - 1984 Prince
23 Always - 1987 Atlantic Starr
24 That's The Way Love Goes - 1993 Janet Jackson
25 Maybe I'm Amazed - 1970 Paul McCartney
26 P.S. I Love You - 1964 The Beatles
27 Alison - 1977 Elvis Costello
28 Your Song - 1971 Elton John
29 Wild Thing - 1966 The Troggs
30 Feelings - 1975 Morris Albert
31 Fallin' - 2001 Alicia Keys
32 Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic - 1981 The Police
33 I'll Make Love To You - 1994 Boyz II Men
34 Time After Time - 1984 Cyndi Lauper
35 This Boy - 1964 The Beatles
36 Best Of My Love - 1977 The Emotions
37 She's Got A Way - 1971 Billy Joel
38 I'd Do Anything For Love (But I Won't Do That) - 1993 Meat Loaf
39 Three Times A Lady - 1978 The Commodores
40 It Must Have Been Love - 1986 Roxette
41 I Just Want To Be Your Everything - 1977 Andy Gibb
42 First Time Ever I Saw Your Face - 1972 Roberta Flack
43 Nobody Wants To Be Lonely - 2000 Ricky Martin
44 Unchained Melody - 1965 The Righteous Brothers
45 I Need Love - 1987 LL Cool J
46 Love To Love You Baby - 1976 Donna Summer
47 I Want To Know What Love Is - 1985 Foreigner
48 My Heart Will Go On - 1997 Celine Dion
49 Eternal Flame - 1988 The Bangles
50 How Do I Live - 1997 LeAnn Rimes
51 Baby, I Love Your Way - 1976 Peter Frampton
52 Hero - 2001 Enrique Iglesias
53 Roxanne - 1987 Sting & The Police
54 Tell Me What You See - 1965 The Beatles
55 I Don't Want To Miss A Thing - 2002 Aerosmith
56 Here And Now - 1989 Luther Vandross
57 Don't Speak - 1995 No Doubt
58 Crazy For You - 1987 Madonna
59 Stop To Love - 1986 Luther Vandross
60 Total Eclipse Of The Heart - 1983 Bonnie Tyler
61 How Deep Is Your Love - 1978 The Bee Gees
62 Heartbreak Hotel - 1956 Elvis Presley
63 I'll Follow The Sun - 1964 The Beatles
64 Open Arms - 1982 Journey
65 Breathe - 1999 Faith Hill
66 You're The One That I Want - 1978 John Travolta w/ Olivia Newton-John
67 Happy Together - 1967 The Turtles
68 I'll Stand By You - 1994 The Pretenders
69 You Don't Bring Me Flowers - 1979 Barbra Streisand w/ Neil Diamond
70 All Out Of Love - 1980 Air Supply
71 Secret Garden - 1995 Bruce Springsteen
72 We Belong - 1985 Pat Benatar
73 Un-break My Heart - 1996 Toni Braxton
74 I Will - 1968 The Beatles
75 You're In My Heart - 1978 Rod Stewart
76 This I Promise You - 2000 NSYNC
77 Unforgettable - 1991 Natalie Cole f/ Nat King Cole
78 I'll Be There For You - 1989 Bon Jovi
79 Girl - 1965 The Beatles
80 All Cried Out - 1986 Lisa Lisa & Cult Jam w/ Full Force
81 Iris - 1998 Goo Goo Dolls
82 More Than A Feeling - 1976 Boston
83 By Your Side - 2000 Sade
84 If I Fell - 1964 The Beatles
85 Love Will Keep Us Together - 1975 Captain & Tennille
86 Never Tear Us Apart - 1988 INXS
87 I Feel For You - 1984 Chaka Khan
88 Alone - 1987 Heart
89 I Can't Make You Love Me - 1991 Bonnie Raitt
90 Woman - 1981 John Lennon
91 Here There And Everywhere - 1966 The Beatles
92 You Are The Sunshine Of My Life - 1973 Stevie Wonder
93 (Everything I Do) I Do It For You - 1991 Bryan Adams
94 You're Still The One - 1997 Shania Twain
95 You Are So Beautiful - 1975 Joe Cocker
96 Always On My Mind - 1982 Willie Nelson
97 Because You Loved Me - 1996 Celine Dion
98 I Melt With You - 1983 Modern English
99 Save The Best For Last - 1991 Vanessa Williams
100 Words Of Love - 1964 The Beatles
WELCOMING YOUR GUESTS
The receiving line at the reception is usually for very formal weddings. The traditional order of the line is:
• Bride’s Parents
• Groom’s Parents
• Bride and Groom
• Bridesmaids or Chief Bridesmaid
GUEST BOOK
Consider a guest book, signature plate or signature bear as it can be a lovely memento of your wedding day. Place the book, plate or bear on a table (at the end of the receiving line if you are having one) or have it passed around the reception, table by table.
BRIDE’S GARTER
The bride’s garter is thrown to the single men at the reception. The garter throwing can be done in two ways. The groom can remove the garter from the bride’s leg and throw it backwards towards the single men. Or the bride can remove it and throw it herself. According to tradition the man who catches it will be the next man to
marry.
BRIDE’S BOUQUET
Here the bride throws the bouquet backwards over her shoulder to the single women. Traditionally, the woman who catches it will be the next woman to marry. But don’t
throw your own bouquet, which you might like to dry and frame - order a throw posy
instead when you order your bouquet.
BRIDAL PARTY SEATING
Chief Bridesmaid Groom’s Father Bride’s Mother Groom Bride Brides Father ‘Groom’s Mother Best Man Bridesmaid Groomsman Chief Bridesmaid Groom Bride Best Man Bridesmaid Groomsman Bridesmaid Groomsman Chief Bridesmaid Groom Bride Best Man Bridesmaid Groomsman
BRIDAL PARTY SEATING
TRADITIONAL SEATING PLAN WITH PARENTS AT BRIDAL TABLE
SEATING PLAN WITH ALL ATTENDANTS, WITH SEPARATE TABLE FOR PARENTS
ALTERNATIVE SEATING PLAN WITH ALL ATTENDANTS
Toasts and speeches usually begin at the end of the reception dinner while coffee and cake are being served.It is important to choose a good speechmaker who is fluent and entertaining and, most importantly, one who will keep it brief. The speechmaker should be someone you trust - someone who won’t make you blush, or embarrass you with stories of past relationships you’d rather forget - someone who won’t be long, boring and irrelevant.
A good speech is a truly memorable one - one that friends and relatives will refer to long after the wedding is over and happily retell. Some of your friends may have training in public speaking, others may have good writing skills and can craft a nice speech to read at the reception. Choose someone with good delivery who won’t be overcome with nerves and who can hold the attention of your guests for a maximum of five minutes.
TRADITIONAL ORDER OF SPEECHES
• Welcome by the MC
• Grace
• Entrée is served
• MC or bride’s father proposes Loyal Toast (only for very formal weddings)
• Main course is served
• Dessert and coffee is served
• MC introduces the speaker who will propose the toast to the bride and groom
• Toast to the bride and groom - by family friend or relative
• MC introduces the groom (and bride)
• Groom (and bride) responds and toasts the bridesmaids
• MC introduces the best man
• Best man (and chief bridesmaid) responds
• MC introduces the speaker to toast the bride’s parents
• Toast to the parents of the bride by family friend or relative
• Response by bride’s father
• Toast to the parents of the groom by bride’s father, family friend or relative
• Response by groom’s father
• MC asks if anyone else would like to speak
• Best man or chief bridesmaid reads messages
• MC also introduces the: - First dance
- Cutting of the cake
- Throwing of the garter.
IF YOU WANT SHORTER SPEECHES…
• MC introduces the speaker who will propose the toast to the bride and groom
• Toast to the bride and groom - by family friend or relative or best man
• MC introduces the groom
• Groom responds and toasts the bridesmaids
• Best man responds and toasts the parents of the bride
• MC introduces bride’s father
• Bride’s father responds and toasts parents of the groom
• Best man reads messages.
THE MASTER OF CEREMONIES
The Master of Ceremonies introduces the speakers, the bridal waltz, the cutting of the cake and the tossing of the bouquet and garter. It is the MC who controls the flow of proceedings once the speeches start.
As the MC introduce yourself to the venue’s co-ordinator to organise timing of the speeches, and to check that champagne for the toasts and items such as a cake knife are available. Also introduce yourself to the DJ or musicians to ensure the music for the bridal waltz is ready.
Plan your speeches to last around two minutes for the first one and then around one minute introducing each speaker. Unless you are an experienced speechmaker then you should be well prepared. Your speeches can be funny but remember nothing tasteless or embarrassing.
You may find it easier to introduce the speakers if you know a little about them. If possible, arrange to meet them before the wedding. If that is not possible, then introduce yourself to them at the beginning of the reception. Find out some interesting details about the speechmakers and the bride and groom, such as
their interests, professions or achievements. Anecdotes are usually well received so speak to friends and family of the speechmakers and the bride and groom to learn something funny about their past. You can also include jokes or quotations if you think it is appropriate, in fact jokes and quotations can often be a very good way of opening your speech.
GROOM’S SPEECH
The groom’s speech is expected to be more serious than the best man’s speech, so it can be an easier speech to prepare. If you feel a little nervous about giving your speech, remember that your wedding guests are your friends and family and they are all looking forward to hearing you speak. In your speech, you can:
• Thank the bride for marrying you
• Thank the bride’s parents for the wedding and for the great job they have done in raising their daughter
• Thank your parents for all they have done for you
• Relate a humorous courtship tale
• Thank your best man, groomsmen and ushers
• Share your thoughts about your bride and your future together.
BRIDE’S SPEECH
More and more brides these days are getting up on their feet and saying a few words. Your speech can follow the guidelines for the groom’s speech.
BEST MAN’S SPEECH
The best man’s speech is usually the funniest of all the wedding speeches but it is not the place to air the groom’s dirty linen or ridicule him in front of his bride. Many of the guests at the wedding will be the bridal couple’s family who may be embarrassed if your speech is too X-rated. So keep it humorous and family orientated.
If you’re not sure where to start, we suggest you:
• Start your speech with a quote, it can be a good ice breaker and will get the crowd on your side
• Thank the groom for asking you to be his best man
• Describe your relationship to the groom and bride as many of the guests may be unaware of this
• Tell an amusing tale about an interesting adventure you have had with the groom
• Relate an amusing story about how the newlyweds first met or a more recent event
• Thank the bride on behalf of the bridesmaids, flower girls, page boys and ring bearers
• Thank the hosts of the wedding on behalf of the guests
• Finish up with a message of congratulations and best wishes for their future to the bridal couple.
Your speech will be much better accepted by the bridal couple and the guests if you do not:
• Tell stories about the groom’s ex-girlfriends
• Tell stories about any of the groom’s bad habits
• Make rude jokes.
CHIEF BRIDESMAID’S SPEECH
Just like the bride, more and more bridesmaids are also speaking at weddings. A bridesmaid’s speech would be similar to the best man’s speech. You are not expected to be as funny as the best man, but of course an amusing speech about the bride should go down well. You can finish off your speech by reading any messages not read by the best man.
FATHER OF THE BRIDE’S SPEECH
The father of the bride responds to the toast to the bride’s parents. Your response is on behalf of the bride’s mother so don’t forget to include her in your speech (for example say “we” rather than “I”). Your speech can include:
• A story about the bride in her childhood, about her growing up and something about her relationship with her family
• Something about the groom and how he has been welcomed into your family
• Finish up with a message of congratulations and best wishes for their future.
FATHER OF THE GROOM’S SPEECH
The groom’s father’s speech follows along the lines of the bride’s father’s speech.
RELATIVE OR FAMILY FRIEND’S TOASTS TO BRIDAL COUPLE’S PARENTS
The speeches to toast the parents’ of the bride and groom should cover:
• A little about them
• How you know them
• How they have welcomed the bride or groom into their respective families
• The toast - “please raise your glasses to [first names of parents]”.
TIPS FOR GREAT SPEECHES
Be prepared - start writing your speech at least three weeks before the big event.
What would you like to say?
-take some time to really think about what you would like to say about the person you are toasting
- what are their achievements or personal aspirations or goals
- how do they relate with friends and family
- is there a special event in their lives that is worth a mention
- what are your own feelings for that person
- what are your wishes for the bridal couple’s future?
You don’t have to be funny -it is better to give a heartfelt speech than one that is funny for the sake of being funny.
Keep it short - a speech around 3 to 5 minutes is all you will need. If you wish to speak for longer then plan no more than 10 minutes maximum.
Practice - read your speech out loud at least three times before the big night.
Speak slowly and speak up - make sure that all your hardwritten words can be heard and understood by all the audience.
A number of rehearsals in a slow and clear voice will help give you confidence.
Engage your audience – look up from your notes to the audience and the bridal couple as often as you can.
Stay sober - don’t drink too much before your speech.
WEDDING ANNIVERSARIES
| ANNIVERSARY | TRADITIONAL | CONTEMPORARY |
| First | Paper | Clocks |
| Second | Cotton | China |
| Third | Leather | Crystal, glass |
| Fourth | Fruit, flowers | Electrical |
| Fifth | Wood | Silverware |
| Sixth | Candy, iron | Wood |
| Seventh | Copper, wool | Desk set |
| Eighth | Bronze, pottery | Linen, lace |
| Ninth | Pottery, willow | Leather |
| Tenth | Tin, aluminium | Diamond jewellery |
| Eleventh | Steel | Fashion jewellery |
| Twelfth | Silk, linen | Pearl, coloured gem |
| Thirteenth | Lace | Textile, fur |
| Fourteenth | Ivory | Gold jewellery |
| Fifteenth | Crystal | Watch |
| Twentieth | China | Platinum |
| Twenty-fifth | Silver | Silver |
| Thirtieth | Pearl | Diamond |
| Thirty-fifth | Coral | Jade |
| Fortieth | Ruby | Ruby |
| Forty-fifth | Sapphire | Sapphire |
| Fiftieth | Gold | Gold |
| Fifty-fifth | Emerald | Emerald |
| Sixtieth | Diamond | Diamond |
| Seventy-fifth | Diamond | Diamond |